I've been thinking about the importance of positive self talk a lot lately. It is so easy to talk negatively about ourselves. I am definitely guilty of talking poorly about myself. I am used to always telling myself that I am not good enough, not worthy enough, that I am ugly, that I am fat, that I look terrible. When I was at 211 pounds and even throughout most of last year these were my regular thoughts. I didn't have a very good opinion about myself and that is one of the things that triggered my desire to change. I didn't like who I was and I wanted to change.
Since I have started weight training with the Chalean Extreme program, I have noticed changes in more than just my strength. I have started noticing for the first time changes in the way that I think. Since I have lost 63 pounds I startle myself every so often in the mirror and say "wow! I look pretty good!" Believe me, I am still way to focused on my flaws and how far I still need to go, so it is nice when I surprise myself and I look better than I think I do. I have noticed an increase in my energy levels since I started lifting weights and I believe that is a mood booster for me since for as long as I can remember, I was always tired. It didn't matter how much sleep I got, or what time of day it was. I was always tired and never had any energy to do much of anything. I'm sure that can be contributed to my poor eating habits and lack of exercise.
It is also nice that Chalean is so positive on her DVDs. Throughout the whole program she is always telling you that you can do this, that you are worth it, that you are beautiful, that you are changing your life. Chalean positive talks to you and it is some of the only time that I really get to hear things like that from someone other than my husband (which I tend to roll my eyes and think "you have to say that or I'll be mad at you"). But I have noticed that I have started to have these thoughts in my mind too, and it has started to change my mood. Over the past few weeks I have been happier, and generally in a better mood. When I think negative thoughts about myself, I put myself in a bad mood because I don't feel good about myself. Then I start to take it out on everything around me: my kids, my husband, I eat more. I get grumpy and snappy. Now that I have started to think more positively about myself I have noticed that I am nicer, I don't get angry as quickly, I am happy to comply with simple requests and just generally happier. For a long time I have been thinking about happiness and how I can be a happier person, and I never really thought about self talk. Of course, I needed to change my life around as well so I could be happier with who I was.
Positive self talk I am discovering is very important. What can we say to ourselves other than "I am fat" and "I hate the way I look" or "I am so disgusting"? First I think we need to commit to change! If you are not happy with yourself then why do you allow yourself to be in that unhappy place! Perhaps it is familiarity or comfort, but we can change. One thing that helped me a little with the negative self talk was thinking things to myself along the lines of "I am changing" "I am working hard" "I may be fat now but not for much longer" "I am getting healthier" "I am getting more fit". Progression thoughts. I knew I was working towards my goal, even though I am not there yet I am still working, still improving and today I am in a better place than I was yesterday. You need to tell yourself things that you can believe. I couldn't tell myself "I am beautiful" because I didn't believe it. I couldn't tell myself "I look good" because I didn't believe it and my internal voice would just scoff at myself and I would roll my eyes at myself if I tried to say these phrases and immediately I would hear "yeah right!"
Now I am starting to believe that I look good because I feel good. I look at pictures of where I have come from and I amaze myself at what I used to look like. I am still realizing how bad of a situation I was in. I would sit around and wonder why I had no energy and blame things like the kids, when in reality it was my weight and my diet that was to blame. It was me and only I could change myself into the person I really want to be.
27 more pounds to go, skinny, happy, fit, and energetic me here I come!
The good the Bad and the ugly. My personal journey to become healthy, happy, fit, and to attain peace with food and myself.
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Getting Started Tips: Making the Decision
I have had several people ask me lately about what I am doing and how I lost 50 pounds, which inspired me to write a series of Tip posts and I want to kick off today with the first one: Getting Started.
When I think of getting started I think of that very first decision we make. Many people talk about having an "ah ha" moment where they realized that they need to lose weight and that moment motivated them to change their lives. If any of you are lucky enough to have had an "ah ha" moment then you probably have already lost weight. More often though I find that the majority of people are like me- they know they need to lose weight, most have tried to lose through various diets but then gained all the weight back maybe because they just couldn't maintain the eating regime, or they felt starved on a diet. So now you are back at square one and maybe even square zero, because if you are like me you end up gaining even more weight on the rebound after a diet.
There was no "ah ha" moment for me. I knew I needed to lose weight. I knew I was unhappy with my image, energy, fitness, and basically everything physical about me. I needed to make a decision to change my life because diets don't work. If you say "I am going to go on a diet to lose weight" I promise you that you will fail or end up gaining all the weight back because diets don't work. Typically diets restrict one food group or another (carbs, fats, eat only protein, etc) and then your body begins to go into starvation mode because it is not getting the nutrients that it needs. When you make your decision to lose weight, you have to make it with the right mind set. You have to be ready and willing to change FOR LIFE! You need to understand that you are going to make a lifestyle change and therefore you should not change anything that you cannot maintain for life.
This is where most people get themselves into trouble, including myself. I used to think "okay, I am going to do this diet for a little while, and once I lose the weight I won't need to do it anymore". That is one of the biggest lies we tell ourselves when we first venture into weight loss. We need to be thinking "My desire to lose weight, become healthier and happier, and improve my self esteem and self image is strong enough to willingly change my lifestyle." Now I want to point out that desire is not the same thing as motivation. Motivation comes and goes, and as many of you know, while your motivation will start out strong at the beginning, once things get hard, a lot of times your motivation disappears and you feel like giving up or quitting. What is going to hold you through these tough times until your motivation returns? I believe that your desire, which never dies, is the lifeline that you need to cling to during these moments. We all want to lose weight, we all want to be successful, even when things get hard and we don't want to try, we still want the end result and if we can keep that end result in mind that can be enough to carry us through.
So what was different for me this time around? After all I have been on Weight Watchers two other times and tried countless other diets. Honestly, it was my mindset and my desire. This time I was willing to make a long term commitment. I was willing to change how and what I eat (more on that later). My self image and self esteem had hit an all time low and I didn't believe that I could get better unless I lost weight. I believed that if I lost weight, I would be happier with myself, I would have more energy, I would be able to do more things with my children, I would be able to keep up better with the demands placed on my by being a stay at home mom. Lets face it, being a mom is HARD WORK! So my desire to lose weight and more importantly to BE SUCCESSFUL was very strong, so much so that it was almost all I could think about for a long time, and I am still very focused on this. We eat 365 days a year! So you might as well invest the time and energy into figuring out how to do it right!
Lastly, I want to close with a word on determination. On one of my all time favorite blogs: www.runsforcookies.com Katie talks about motivation vs determination. Being completely honest, you will not stay motivated the entire time you are losing weight. I have not stayed motivated the entire time, and there was a time in July when I almost gave up. I sure wanted to in that moment but I am glad that I didn't. Why didn't I give up? Because I had determination and desire. Determination is being committed to a decision, doing the daily tasks it takes to get there no matter how mundane they may seem, and never losing sight of the end goal. Being determined means that you are going to achieve your goal whether or not you have the motivation to do it.
This time around I am determined and dedicated to this goal. I am going to reach my goal weight of 125 and enter a healthier and happier time of my life, that is why I have made the changes I have, and I am sticking to it.
You can read Katie's post on Determination VS Motivation HERE
When I think of getting started I think of that very first decision we make. Many people talk about having an "ah ha" moment where they realized that they need to lose weight and that moment motivated them to change their lives. If any of you are lucky enough to have had an "ah ha" moment then you probably have already lost weight. More often though I find that the majority of people are like me- they know they need to lose weight, most have tried to lose through various diets but then gained all the weight back maybe because they just couldn't maintain the eating regime, or they felt starved on a diet. So now you are back at square one and maybe even square zero, because if you are like me you end up gaining even more weight on the rebound after a diet.
There was no "ah ha" moment for me. I knew I needed to lose weight. I knew I was unhappy with my image, energy, fitness, and basically everything physical about me. I needed to make a decision to change my life because diets don't work. If you say "I am going to go on a diet to lose weight" I promise you that you will fail or end up gaining all the weight back because diets don't work. Typically diets restrict one food group or another (carbs, fats, eat only protein, etc) and then your body begins to go into starvation mode because it is not getting the nutrients that it needs. When you make your decision to lose weight, you have to make it with the right mind set. You have to be ready and willing to change FOR LIFE! You need to understand that you are going to make a lifestyle change and therefore you should not change anything that you cannot maintain for life.
This is where most people get themselves into trouble, including myself. I used to think "okay, I am going to do this diet for a little while, and once I lose the weight I won't need to do it anymore". That is one of the biggest lies we tell ourselves when we first venture into weight loss. We need to be thinking "My desire to lose weight, become healthier and happier, and improve my self esteem and self image is strong enough to willingly change my lifestyle." Now I want to point out that desire is not the same thing as motivation. Motivation comes and goes, and as many of you know, while your motivation will start out strong at the beginning, once things get hard, a lot of times your motivation disappears and you feel like giving up or quitting. What is going to hold you through these tough times until your motivation returns? I believe that your desire, which never dies, is the lifeline that you need to cling to during these moments. We all want to lose weight, we all want to be successful, even when things get hard and we don't want to try, we still want the end result and if we can keep that end result in mind that can be enough to carry us through.
So what was different for me this time around? After all I have been on Weight Watchers two other times and tried countless other diets. Honestly, it was my mindset and my desire. This time I was willing to make a long term commitment. I was willing to change how and what I eat (more on that later). My self image and self esteem had hit an all time low and I didn't believe that I could get better unless I lost weight. I believed that if I lost weight, I would be happier with myself, I would have more energy, I would be able to do more things with my children, I would be able to keep up better with the demands placed on my by being a stay at home mom. Lets face it, being a mom is HARD WORK! So my desire to lose weight and more importantly to BE SUCCESSFUL was very strong, so much so that it was almost all I could think about for a long time, and I am still very focused on this. We eat 365 days a year! So you might as well invest the time and energy into figuring out how to do it right!
Lastly, I want to close with a word on determination. On one of my all time favorite blogs: www.runsforcookies.com Katie talks about motivation vs determination. Being completely honest, you will not stay motivated the entire time you are losing weight. I have not stayed motivated the entire time, and there was a time in July when I almost gave up. I sure wanted to in that moment but I am glad that I didn't. Why didn't I give up? Because I had determination and desire. Determination is being committed to a decision, doing the daily tasks it takes to get there no matter how mundane they may seem, and never losing sight of the end goal. Being determined means that you are going to achieve your goal whether or not you have the motivation to do it.
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| http://www.runsforcookies.com/2012/01/difference-between-motivation-and.html |
You can read Katie's post on Determination VS Motivation HERE
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