Saturday, November 8, 2014

Impulse Eating

I have solved another piece of the puzzle.  I realized today that I am an impulse eater.  Or in other words, I am very much a part of the whole instant gratification mindset that plagues our world today.  Tonight as I was in the middle of a mini binge (it could have been much worse) I was asking myself why I couldn't wait to eat more sweets until tomorrow, or until a few days from now.  I didn't want to stop, I wanted sugar, and I didn't want to argue with myself.  (It's very hard to talk yourself out of a situation when you don't want to be talked out of it).  The answer I gave myself in that moment was "Because I want it now!"  Which was revelatory for me.  I can be a very impulsive person, and I get very strong impulses (usually around shopping or when I want something new, like a dog, or computer game, or whatever the new thing is) and not only are they very hard to resist but I actually have no desire to resist them.  Of course that means that most of the time I end up giving into my impulses, and hence another eating issue has emerged.  Realizing that; no amount of self talk is going to get me off the ledge when I don't want to come down from it.  And so I have been approaching this particular part of eating the wrong way.  I know about eating when I'm bored, or stressed: emotional eating, I have been trying to find better coping mechanisms, but solving my impulse eating and my instant gratification mindset is a whole other animal. 

This is something I need to work on as a whole.  I need to recognize my impulses, label them as impulses and the hard part is to not give into them.  When I have an impulse the draw is incredibly strong, it's time to start exercising some self control.  I do have a few ideas.  For eating, allow myself two treats a week, and these are going to be planned in advance.  It's not Thanksgiving DAY or your birthDAY or Christmas DAY that causes trouble, it's all the other days in-between.  I need to shake off this instant gratification mindset, become more selfless, more humble........ Maybe I should think up some service projects to do, start thinking about others, become less of a consumer and draw closer to God.  For the longest time I figured that when my weight loss journey was done, I could work on other things like spirituality.  But now I realize that I can't continue on in my weight loss journey until I start taking care of my spirituality.  I am too obsessed with food, thinking about weight loss and food and exercise all the time.  I don't want to be obsessed with it.  If I can change my focus, stop thinking about it so much then I will have made a significant step towards living a life free from my crippling addiction to food.

1 comment:

  1. I really think this is my problem after reading the book of Trigger Foods I don't really know if this is the problem for me. I am more like this. When I want something I want it and I want it know. I will get to wanting ice cream or chocolate and I will want it right now. But luckily I don't keep these things in the house so sometimes it makes it easier to talk myself out of eating it. But It will also make me look around the house looking for something to fill the void and make myself mad for eating a million other things that I did not need. I to am trying to work on my spiritually self. The book about food triggers did help with my relationship with God. Thanks for your blog.