I realized the other day that one of the big reasons why I have been
struggling and why I have been avoiding fully committing to getting back
on track is because I have been pushing myself to do things that I
don't enjoy. I don't like lifting weights, I don't like running, and
the classes I have been going to are just too hard for me right now. While Body Pump and Body Attack are good classes, they are very hard classes. I don't really find much joy in body pump (and a whole lot of pain), and body attack is very hard and I think I will enjoy it a lot more when I am about 20 pounds thinner. I've been worrying about competing in a triathlon this summer, I've been worrying about running the 10k in the relay triathlon my father in law has planned and I was so worked up about it that I was self sabotaging myself. I am taking the pressure off of myself and putting a triathlon in the "I want to do it someday" category. Maybe next summer, but I'm not going to focus on it now. After I get to my goal weight then I will start to think about doing a triathlon. I'm going back to my roots, back to what I truly love doing so that I won't have to worry about keeping it up in maintenance. I like Zumba. Correction. I LOVE ZUMBA! I could do it every day, and it makes me happy. I feel good when I do it, and I feel good when I am done. I smile when I do it, and I look forward to it. Zumba is definitely the activity I am going to be doing the most in maintenance, and it was what I was doing when I lost 60 pounds in 2013 so why did I stop doing it? Somewhere along the line I got sidetracked. Well now I can honestly say that I have tried many different activities and Zumba is my all time favorite. I have even discovered Zumba toning classes at my gym which focuses more on strength vs cardio! So I don't even have to do body pump to work my muscles! Now Zumba toning is nothing compared to body pump but guess what. I like Zumba toning about a zillion times better than body pump. It makes me happy, and so that is what I am going to do.
I went to Sprouts today and stocked up on fruits and veggies. I'm going to focus on eating my fruits and veggies, something I have definitely been lacking in the past several months. I feel much better when I eat all my fruits and veggies. I feel fuller, my stomach doesn't hurt, and I just generally feel better. Another thing I am changing is my lunch. For two years I have been eating sandwiches for lunch and for two years I have been starving in the afternoon around 2:30-4:00pm and I sit here and say to myself "Why do I get so hungry in the afternoon?!" It finally dawned on me: I don't get hungry after I eat breakfast. I make it all the way to lunch without wanting to eat. How did that happen? I changed what I ate for breakfast because I was tired of feeling so hungry about an hour and a half later after eating cereal. So. Obviously eating sandwich wraps for lunch is the wrong food. It's like eating cereal for breakfast. I just doesn't cut it. I don't know why it took me so long to figure this out! So I am going to be experimenting with my lunches from now on. Today I ordered an Artichoke basil pesto grilled chicken panini on Ciobatta bread. It had cheese on it, which was more fat than I usually eat for lunch, and more carbs in the bread which is more than I usually eat for lunch. I felt really good all afternoon! Granted I was pretty busy this afternoon, I had to go to the grocery store and I redid my nails and my sister came over, but I didn't feel light headed, I didn't crash in the afternoon and I didn't feel like I was starving. Around 3pm I ate an apple and some string cheese.
I am back in business! I found myself an accountability partner and tomorrow you will get to find out what my big reward for reaching my goal weight is going to be. I'm so excited for it!!!
If you are avoiding getting back on track there is probably something wrong with what you have been doing. Either your eating is too restrictive or your chosen exercise needs to change. You shouldn't cringe at the thought of getting back on track, it should be something that fits you and your way of life. It should be liveable, changeable, and perhaps one day you will love living your life that way. That doesn't mean you won't have challenges and it doesn't mean it won't be hard, it means that you shouldn't hate doing it. If you hate it, it's not right for you and you need to let it go. Find something else, there is A LOT out there! So go out and explore, get excited, and find what makes you happy.
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