Thursday, April 10, 2014

Divorcing my Scale

My scale.  A tool or a torture?  Maybe both.  I've learned that this journey is more that just about the numbers on the scale.  This past year I have been so focused on the numbers that the scale shows.  I would be happy when it registered a loss, and really upset when it showed a gain.  My weigh in could affect not only my mood, but my eating as well.  And not in a good way.  If I gained I wouldn't correct and eat healthier and track what I ate, instead I would eat out of control because I was upset.  This really hit home two weeks ago when I was sure I was going to see a loss that week.  I managed to stay off the scale all week.  I felt great, my confidence was high... until I stepped on the scale and it said I "gained" 5 pounds in the week.  I am lifting weights now and the last two months have been hard.  I haven't seen the scale go down and that has been hard on my numbers based mind.  But I have lost 6 inches and I feel great.  I feel strong and my clothes are feeling looser. 

After my 5 pound gain weigh in I completely lost it for a week.  I overate like crazy, and stuffed myself with sugar and junk food.  I couldn't help it.  I was so upset.  Fast forward one week to when I took my measurements for the end of that 30 day weight lifting phase.  I had lost an inch and a half off my hips and another half an inch off my chest, and 2% body fat.  I realized: the numbers on the scale are not everything. 

If I hadn't weighed myself that day, my week would have been completely different.  So for the duration of my next 30 day weight lifting period I have decided to stay off the scale.  And just in case I have the temptation to step on the scale:

Ha!  Now I can't step on the scale mindlessly.  So if I get the urge, I can just look at that and remember that it is off limits this month.  I am doing this so that my weekly weigh ins don't affect my mood so much that it destroys what results I might get.

I am only four days into this next phase and already I feel great.  I have moved on past my bad weigh in and I am focusing on how strong I feel.  I am noticing my pants fit better and these are the things I am now focusing on as well as eating healthy and finding out what works for me.

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