Saturday, May 30, 2015

End of Week

Today started a new week and the end of what has been the hardest week for me since I started.  This past week I have been stressed, emotional, sleep deprived, and low on energy.  Today starts week 5 and ends week 4.  A week like that usually throws me off.  I haven't been able to make it past week 3 in almost a year, since I completed Turbo Fire last August.  I feel like all the odds were against me this week and I was just struggling to stay afloat.  For the past several months I would let this start a downward spiral of poor food choices and binge eating, probably gaining about 5 pounds in one week and then taking forever to get back on track, if I did.  This week, I barely managed to stay afloat weighing in at 150.8. That is a .2 pound loss.  At first I was so depressed and upset, but then I reminded myself how hard last week was and how little energy I had and the non scale victories I had such as running a full 5K (jogging at 6mph for a whole 30 minutes without stopping) and going on that bike ride with my husband and father in law.  Not only did I not gain weight this last week, I managed to go a few tick marks in the right direction.  So was last week a failure?  Not at all!  It wasn't what I wanted to see on the scale.  I want to be back in the 140s so badly and now I will just have to wait longer.  But I will get there eventually, I just have to keep holding on and doing my best.

Lily's fever finally broke Friday morning and I was feeling good, and excited and feeling like the worst was behind me.  But it seems that life wasn't done throwing curve balls at me because at the gym after I finished my 30 minute run I was waiting for a pool lane to open up.  I only had an easy 800 yard swim to do, which would take me about 20 minutes, and I was sitting on one of the benches.  When a lane opened up I got up and jumped in the pool and started swimming.  During my 200 yard warm up I noticed that my back was hurting, and the pain kept building until I had to quit early.  I ended up not doing the last 200 yards because my back hurt so much.  At least this time it was in a different spot.  It was my mid left hand side and it hurt like crazy to pull my arm through the water.  The thing that vexes me so much is I have no idea what I did to injure my back!  I was just sitting!  But my back hurt like crazy for the rest of the day, and my energy completely disappeared.  I put a movie on for the kids when we got home and fell asleep on the couch, then I passed out in bed around 8:15.  I had to sleep on my back all night because sleeping on my side or stomach pulled my back in a way that made it hurt.  I woke up this morning at 6:15 cranky and still utterly exhausted. 

Today was supposed to be a fantastic day, we were going to go hiking, then I was going to do Zumba so I could get in lots of exercise to eat popcorn at the theater tonight, but I just hurt too much.  We did get in a hike, and the kids loved it, especially Lily, (that is until she slipped on a rock and scraped her leg.  She is like me, Zero pain tolerance). 
Isn't she sooooo adorable?  I just love her to pieces.  I'm glad she is feeling better.  The hike took everything out of me though.  When we got home I felt like jelly.  The kids both fell asleep in the car on the way home so we all just took naps (except for Matt).  I don't know why I've been so tired, but my theory is that I just hit a brick wall.  I've been working very hard physically for three weeks on this triathlon training plus I've been doing a lot of Zumba along with it, also I was just so stressed with the kids being sick, and then I had a lot of interrupted sleep nights due to sick kids, and it's entirely possible that I am fighting off their sick germs which is making me tired.  Probably all that combined into one.  But seriously, unless you are throwing up, or have a fever I feel like people just kind of roll their eyes and think "oh yeah?  you're feeling sick huh?  where are your symptoms? Oh your tired?  Wuss."  Do you ever feel that way?  Anyway, we did have a great time at the movie.  After my nap I started feeling a little better, more awake, and the move was awesome!  We saw Mad Max Fury Road.  I shared some popcorn with my sister and I was totally planning on refilling that thing and eating two buckets of popcorn like we usually do, except this time I was done after one bucket.  I didn't want any more, so I didn't eat anymore.  That is unusual, but I'm not complaining. 

I took a break today with my food, and while my eating was less than stellar, it also wasn't as terrible as it could have been.  I am planning on being spot on for the rest of the week with my eating and I am just hoping and praying and pleading that my back will feel better by Monday because I need to start week 5 of training which takes things up a notch as far as distance and duration goes in my biking and swimming and running.  My running jumps up to 40 minutes along with my biking and my swimming is going to jump up to about 1500 yards.  As of right now I pretty much can't do anything with where my back hurts.  At least the last time I threw out my back I knew exactly when and how it happened (if not the why- all I did was pick up Lily last time and boom!  my lower back decides to freak out and I'm incapacitated for a month).  Anyway, the road to a more active lifestyle seems to be a treacherous path to walk.

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