Sunday, March 30, 2014

152 and Angry

I had a really good week this week.  I exercised every day, played with the kids outside, and ate healthy food. I felt good and thought I was on track this week to hit my goals.  So why then did I weigh in at 152?!?  That is 5 pounds higher than last weeks weigh in.  FIVE POUNDS!  How did I gain five pounds last week?  I thought I was doing good by staying off the scale but apparently it did more damage than good.  The only day where I didn't stick to purely healthy choices was yesterday when my Sister-In-Law got married.  Even then I didn't pig out!  I ate moderately and I had one piece of cake which I shared with Chloe.  Nothing that would make me gain five pounds!

I am so angry and so upset.  I figured that with yesterday not being as good as the rest of the week I would probably see 147 again at the worst because I really thought I was on track to reach 145 this week.  This is the last week of phase 2 for my weight lifting program.  Phase three starts one week from tomorrow and when that is done I can't wait do switch back to cardio being my dominant exercise instead of weight lifting.  This is just killing me.

I am going to start tracking again right away.  I am thinking of just throwing out this weigh in, because there is no way that I really gained five pounds last week.  I should have weighed myself Saturday morning but I wanted to be good and make it the whole week without weighing myself.  Maybe I will weigh myself on Tuesday and take that weigh in as my official weigh in.  I just have to not think about it until then, a virtually impossible task.  Might as well ask me to not breathe for two days.

Yesterday I felt thin, beautiful, happy, energetic, and excited.  Today I feel fat, depressed, and lethargic. I feel like I will never reach my goal and like I have been stuck around 150 for way too long.  Nearly three months after first hitting 150, here I still am.

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